Love and Lies

Love and Lies

An Essay on Truthfulness, Deceit, and the Growth and Care of Erotic Love

Book - 2015
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A provocative and unsettling look at the nature of love and deception

Is it possible to love well without lying? At least since Socrates's discourse on love in Plato's Symposium , philosophers have argued that love can lead us to the truth--about ourselves and the ones we love. But in the practical experience of erotic love--and perhaps especially in marriage--we find that love and lies often work hand in hand, and that it may be difficult to sustain long-term romantic love without deception, both of oneself and of others.
Drawing on contemporary philosophy, psychoanalysis and cognitive neuroscience, his own personal experience, and such famed and diverse writers on love as Shakespeare, Stendhal, Proust, Adrienne Rich, and Raymond Carver, Clancy Martin--himself divorced twice and married three times--explores how love, truthfulness, and deception work together in contemporary life and society. He concludes that learning how to love and loving well inevitably requires lying, but also argues that the bestlove relationships draw us slowly and with difficulty toward honesty and trust.
Love and Lies is a relentlessly honest book about the difficulty of love, which is certain to both provoke and entertain.

Publisher: New York : Farrar, Straus, and Giroux, 2015.
Edition: 1st ed.
ISBN: 9780374281069
Branch Call Number: 177.3 MAR
Characteristics: 258 p. ; 22 cm.

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lisatofts
Apr 27, 2015

Beautifully written prose with deep-cutting honesty.
Author Martin opens the narrative with shocking and, sometimes uncomfortable, episodes. As the book progresses, the reader feels the naivety and rawness of the characters he writes about. This is truly a deep and sincere account of the events of the author’s life. He brings an authentic and open approach to seemingly mundane life experiences.
Because of the elegant way Author Martin approaches his emotions, he effectively captivates the reader. At the beginning of the book, I felt I was sitting on a park bench in Fish Creek Park with a stranger. By the end of the book, I was sitting with a new best friend. It is rare that Philosophy books can move me so quickly and easily like this one did.
-- Tofts Reviews

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lisatofts
Apr 27, 2015

lisatofts thinks this title is suitable for between the ages of 25 and 99

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